I was diagnosed today with a suspected case of H1N1 (yes, the dreaded “swine flu”), so I decided I would launch my new blog by starting a daily account of my experience with H1N1.

Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2009

9 PM EST: Hey, my eye sockets hurt. Hope it isn’t swine flu. Haha.

10 PM EST: Now my back and legs hurt. And I can barely look around without having quite a bit of pain in my eye sockets. This is weird.

11 PM EST: Good night, moon. Hope I don’t get worse in the night.

Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2009

6:30 AM EST: Oh God, I got worse in the night.

7:00 AM EST: I know I need to eat something for breakfast, but I’m just not hungry. Frosted Mini Wheats and toast should sit OK.

10 AM EST: Oh, hey. I feel even worse now. And look… the University (where I work) offers free H1N1 screenings. I gotsta’ get me some of that.

10:30 AM EST: University nurse is not smart. Also, they’re conducting screenings in the same place where students who have tested H1N1 positive are being quarantined. Dude in a mask wanders past me to get a “muffin or something.” Awesome. If I don’t already have H1N1, I will before I leave here.

11:00 AM EST: Nurse said I “probably” have H1N1 and that I should go to my doctor to be sure, since the University only does a symptomatic screening.

11:30 AM EST: Doctor Very Jewish, my family practitioner, confirms that I “probably” have swine flu. Here are his exact words: “You probably have swine flu.” Doc sticks a sharp swab into my brain via my nostril to collect a sample. Lab results take 1-2 days. He’s 95 percent sure I have swine flu, because it’s the only flu going around right now.

Noon EST: How do I feel? I took a couple Tylenol and feel OK. Pretty weak, a little achy and a mild cough. So far, this thing is not living up to the hype. Let’s hope it continues to be pretty mild.